Who for...

At some point in this crazy thing we call Weight Loss, you have to figure out who you are doing it for. And I've come to learn, you can't do it for anyone but yourself. It just doesn't work any other way. I'd like to say that I do this for D, but I know its not the truth. Sure, he might be some of my motivation to keep going, and its nice to have more energy to deal with him, but he's not why I'm doing this. I could say I'm doing this because I know people are watching the blogs. And
while that might be the truth, and its also some motivation because who wants to post that you just ate a crapload of cheesy junk food! But its also not WHY I'm doing this. I'm doing this for me. Because I was sick and tired of being sick and tired. And once you hit a goal, then you know you CAN. And so can't just give up. Its like you would tell a child who says "I can't do it!!", I KNOW you can do it because I've seen you do it before, even if you don't want to try it right now. And
having lost 75 lbs, I now know I can, so whats another 75 in the big scheme of things?

And I've really come to realize this more over the last few weeks, especially with this dang plateau (on a sidenote: I'm so used to saying dang/damn/freakin plateau on here that I almost said it out loud in front of my grandma the other day...oops!). At some point, you have to
suck it up and realize that YOU are the only one who can make the decision, the only one who makes the choice each day to do what you are going to do. Its given me the strength to know that I really can do this on my own when the time comes for it. Sure, its nice to have the
accountability of the blog, which is something I doubt I will ever stop doing, but the dynamic of your weight loss changes when you pull the strength from within and don't rely on others to be strong for you. The only perfect human ever was Jesus. HE will never fail us. But we are
human, we fail. And its ok. The key is, what you do when you do fail. Do you allow that to set you back? Ya know, I think in some cases, its ok to take a step back and re-evaluate what you are doing. Two steps forward, one step back, right? As long as you keep taking those steps
forward, it will all work out in the end.

I know this was a crazy long blog, but I really felt like it needed to be written today, and I'm sorry its kind of all over the place. You should have seen the first draft!